We're all doing time. Every. Single. One. Of. Us. The only question is: what/who are you imprisoned to? I had to have my freedom taken away to find: freedom. I had to find freedom to become δέσμιος of Christ.
The Syrophoenician Woman: Part XIV
Well, this is the longest ones that I've ever written. But. It's my favorite. By far. And it's the one that will answer one of the “burning questions” that so many people want to know. So many people secretly talk about... the hushed whispers... The implied accusations...
Well, I am who I am by the grace of God. And the grace of God only. And I am not ashamed to tell this story. I've been wanting to tell it for some time now, but the timing hasn't been right. I've tried to force it... to make it the right time, but it ALWAYS fell apart. It wasn't the time. It wasn't His time.
It's time now.
It's true: Bad decisions do limit future options.
But you know what else? Bad decisions make the BEST stories of Gods Grace. His Mercy. His Patience. And His unfailing love. Bad decisions DO limit future options. OUR future options. BUT. The Grace of God is NEVER limited in our lives. Not even by us. Not even by our mistakes.
I am grateful for the timing—HIS TIMING—to finally come. And these verses have FINALLY given the perfect opportunity. I am so grateful. So very grateful.
Matthew 15:21 Jesus went away from there, and withdrew into the district of Tyre and Sidon. 22 And a Canaanite woman from that region came out and began to cry out, saying, “Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of David; my daughter is cruelly demon-possessed.” 23 But He did not answer her a word. And His disciples came and implored Him, saying, “Send her away, because she keeps shouting at us.” 24 But He answered and said, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” 25 But she came and began to bow down before Him, saying, “Lord, help me!” 26 And He answered and said,“It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.”
In other words: it's not proper to take from insider and give to the outsiders... to take from those who are familiar to us and apply it to strangers... To take away from the special... the chosen... the worthy and let a bunch of good for nothing ____________ (insert your favorite racial slur here) have it.
Harsh?
You better believe it was! It was very harsh! Even though I'm on record saying: “I believe there was a certain softness in His voice... a kindness... a concern... a compassion. And, I believe there was a slight smile on His face... a twinkle in His eye... Maybe even a quick wink...”
Still! These words could be viewed as being extremely harsh! Extremely ugly! Extremely rude! Extremely vulgar. I mean they were very derogatory...
The Lord just compared her... He just equated her with being a dog. D-O-G. He just reaffirmed the normal—and accepted—Jewish stance for outsiders: DOGS! This wasn't a compliment. It wasn't some cute puppy that He was comparing her to. It was some nasty, mangy, stray mongrel who fed off trash... A walking—and barking—garbage can...
Now, if you have half a brain... you have to start thinking: “Stop! Wait a minute. What? Huh? What exactly is going on here? This statement isn't very 'sweet'. It's not very 'kind'. It's not very 'loving'. It's not very 'compassionate.' Why would Sweet Jesus do this??? Why would Loving Jesus say these words? These hurtful words to this poor woman? This woman who is in pain... This woman who is suffering... This woman who is pleading for the life of her child! Why on earth would The Lord Do this????? It just doesn't make sense. It just doesn't sound right.”
Or maybe the best one of all: “It just doesn't FEEL right.”
Maybe no one has every told you this before, but please... allow me: “When it comes to Bible Doctrine... When it comes to God's Word... YOUR FEELINGS ARE INCONSEQUENTIAL! My feelings are inconsequential. Our feelings are inconsequential. There is only one thing—and one thing only—of any consequence... of any importance... of any significance... and that is: God's Word! Ensuring that is is rightfully divided. That's the only thing that matters. The only thing. How you feel about it... how I feel about it... how we feel about it... not an issue. Not for a second. The only thing that matters is: God's Word. Then: Whether we accept or reject it. Whether we respond to it in humility... or, do we react in arrogance?
That's it.
We either embrace the truth and allow it to start transforming us. To start renovating our souls... Or: Do we start with the self-justification? The projecting? The deflecting? Do we start trying to change the subject? Do we start trying to muddy the waters? Do we start tossing out the red herrings? Do we start trying to go off all kinds of dog paths and create little hypothetical scenarios? Do we try and throw things up from 10 years ago? 20 years ago? 30 years ago? 50 years ago?
Do we start taking issue with the man? Or, do we concentrate and focus on the message?
That's the question.
That's the key.
Just as it was for this woman... This Gentile Woman... This dog... It's exactly the same for us now.
See: The Lord is no longer present—physically--on this earth. Not in the flesh. Not in His body. He is no longer in Hypostatic-Union. The time of The First Advent is over. He humbled Himself and came and dwelt among men... The Word became Flesh and was sent to us [humanity]...
But. He is no longer here—on this earth. Not in His humanity. Not in His resurrection body. Yes, every believer has: “Christ in Us “(Colossians 1:27) and this is not referring to just some attitude that we have—although that attitude should be forming... manifesting itself... and increasing as we grow in grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior. BUT. It means: the actual indwelling of the Shekinah Glory. But that's a subject for another day... Way too much ground to cover here...
But. The point is: Even though The Lord is not here—physically upon this earth—He has not changed! His policies—towards us—have not changed. Any. He still deals with us in grace. And everything that He does for us—even when we don't understand it. It. Is. For. Our. Betterment.
Even when it seems like it isn't.
If you're a parent? And I'm sure many of you are... why do you teach your children? Why do you train your children?
Answer: because you love them? You want them to grow. You want them to mature.
Let me ask you another question? Do your kids always agree with your decisions? Do they always like them? Do they always understand them? Do they always appreciate the words—and actions—that you choose—as their parent.. as their authority...
I would say: “no!” Certainly not.
As children... we often can't see the full picture... we don't understand... we don't comprehended... we are incapable of taking it all in. We have limited information. Just a subset of facts. We have limited experience. We are green! We are wet behind the ears! We don't have a clue!
So, we can either accept what our parents are telling us... what they are enforcing upon us... or, we can reject it. We can realize: “I don't like this. But. They are my parents. And they have authority over me. And I may not agree... I may not like this... But. I'm going to go along with it. I'm going to submit myself to it. I'm going to take it. I'm going to endure. And one day... I will be out of here and I will be able to make my own choices—completely. And I can do whatever I want...”
And you know what? We hit the real world and we find out very quickly: it doesn't happen that way. We are ALWAYS under authority. Somewhere. Some how. Some place. Some one. I don't care if you're CEO of your company... you are still under the authority of someone. Somewhere.
And authority orientation is critical! You can't develop humility.. without it.
A few people that I know posted this photo with a saying on it. You know how it goes... one person posts and everybody starts sharing it... and starts popping up everywhere! On facebook. In your inbox... It just goes viral..
It's amazing how quickly lies spread... they flourish... they prosper... Quickly!
And it's amazing—very sad but amazing—how many believers get sucked into these lies. Who fall for them. Hook, Line, and Sinker! I'm not sure if they just post them... share them... spread them on auto-pilot... without really thinking about what they're doing... Just doing it to do it... Or, if they actually believe the lie themselves! Either way: it's a problem. A real problem. Because either they've allowed apathy to take root... Or, they don't recognize a lie when they see one. They don't recognize lies because: THEY HAVE REJECTED TRUTH!
Anyway...
This photo had a mother with a child on it. And it said something like this: “A mother is the last line of defense against the moral breakdown of society.”
Sounds sweet, doesn't it? Sounds nice, doesn't it? Sounds all warm and fuzzy? Well, you know what: it's a lie! It's not just a lie: it's a damn lie! A damn lie straight from the pits of hell!
Principle: Better to have a HARSH TRUTH given to you than: a sweet lie. Remember that! The truth often hurts, but it will set you free! Lies? Sweet lies? They imprison you. They chain you up. They enslave you. And they choke you... they will kill you!
Truth steps on our toes. I mean: it stomps right on them! Crushes them! And still doesn't get off of them! It keeps on grinding and pressing down... Why? Because that's where HUMILITY begins.
Lies? They puff us up. They make us feel good. They stroke our ego. They tell us what we want to hear. They flatter us. They make us feel important. They make us feel good about ourselves. Noble! Worthy! Deserving! Entitled! It's arrogance and it just keeps growing and growing...
More on that later..
Anyway...
This photo is a lie. A damn lie. A lie from the pits of hell. Why? Well, I will tell you why: Because God's Word says it is! That's why.
Firstly, if a mother is the last line of defense... then there's a problem! A Big problem. God has not ordained the Divine Institution of Motherhood! He has ordained: FAMILY! That means: A HUSBAND and a WIFE. A male and a female! One man. One woman. United. Forever!
Don't get the scenario machine running... I'm not here to play the “what if...” and “what about this...” game. Not my purpose. Scripture is very clear: on marriage. Divorce. And the ability to remarry. Very clear. Not my point. Not here to touch these issues. My point is: God HAS ordained the family. Not just motherhood. It's the family.
So, right off the bat: mothers aren't the last line of defense... it would be: PARENTS are the last line of defense.
But you know what? That's a lie also! Parents aren't the last line of defense! Hardly! Parents—both mother and father!--are the FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE from society breaking down. The First line of defense. They are where the child is born. They are where the child is raised! They are where the child is meant to learn. To grow. To develop. To become a valuable and productive member of society. That is the role of parents!
In addition: it is the parents job to equip their children for this world! To teach them right from wrong. To ensure that they develop norms and standards. That good manners are developed. Poise. Truthfulness. Honesty. Integrity. Virtue. Respect. Honor.
It's the job of the parents! Not the state! Not the public schools system! Not the private school system. Don't blame a teacher for your child... blame THE TEACHER! You! You're the parent! What are you teaching them at home? What are you putting in them at home? So, when they go out in public... when they go to school... when they go out into the world???
And for the Christian Parent... we have an even more important responsibility. The most important responsibility of them all: it's the JOB OF THE PARENTS to teach their children about: God! To give them Gospel! To ensure they understand who The Lord Jesus Christ is. Who He is. And what He's done. To teach them about the spiritual life. To teach them about the 1 John 1:9. To teach them about the problem solving devices found in scripture. About the forty (40) things that they receive at the very moment of salvation. And what it means to them! What is available to them! What they have at their disposal!
You teach them to solve problems with GOD'S WORD! Not to rely on human solutions. Not to be influenced by peer pressure. You teach them to be leaders! Not followers! Leaders! Children who are equipped to stand on their own two feet. Because they stand on the foundation of: BIBLE DOCTRINE! And nothing... NOTHING... NOTHING... will prevail against it. Not them. IT! Bible Doctrine.
So, mothers aren't the last line of defense... that's a lie!
Fathers aren't the last line of defense... that's a lie!
Parents—united together—aren't the last line of defense... that's a lie!
Parents had better be the first line of defense! THE FIRST! Or, you know what? If they aren't... their sweet and precious and 'innocent' (give me a break!) child will get to meet the last line of defense... they'll get to meet that line of defense up close... up close and personally...
And do you know what that last line of defense is? Do you know what the last line of defense for protecting society--internally--is? It's: THE STATE! It's our Police Officers. Our Law Enforcement Agencies. It's the District Attorney's Office. It's the Judicial System. It's the prison system...
God has set up the family as THE FIRST LINE OF DEFENSE for protecting society. The family gets their shot... mom and dad have roughly 18 years (give or take) to train up a child....
But if they fail to do their job...
If they shirk their responsibility...
If they're derelict in their duties...
If they're too busy having fun...
If they go AWOL on their children...
If they have more important things to do...
More important people to see...
Better places to be...
Or, if their child is just extremely hardheaded and recalcitrant.... just WILL NOT learn...
Just bound and determined to do it their way....
Just refuses to conform to what is and isn't acceptable in normal—and polite—society...
If a child leaves the home and becomes a monster instead of a man...
Who preys on others...
Who exploits others...
Who takes advantage of others...
Who has no regard for other people... their person or their property...
Sooner or later...
It's bound to happen...
If they don't learn to orient to authority... if they don't develop humility somehow... somewhere...
A lot of times kids can join the military... and putting on that uniform will teach them. They'll learn to develop some humility. They'll come under enforced humility. And that uniform will teach them. That uniform will beat the foolishness right out of them... That uniform will knock the arrogance right out of them... That uniform will fix a lot of things...
But if they don't take that route...
If they don't find themselves in a place where they learn to operate under authority...
if they keep heading down the wrong path...
Firsthand.
It wa
The last line of defense will kick in... And that is the state.
And if you keep pushing... If you keep begging for it... If you keep testing your luck... If you keep trying its patience... it will give you the privilege of wearing another uniform altogether. A prison uniform. And it's not fun. It's not fun—at all.
I know.
It was my plan to go the Marine Corp. God said, “No. You're going to prison.” And that's where I began to learn: humility. AND... it's where everything started becoming very clear to me: Bible Doctrine Works. Bible Doctrine is everything.
As a teenager... I did A LOT of things that I shouldn't have done. A lot of them. Too many. And you know what? I got away with them. Most of them. I never got caught. And if I did caught... I could talk my way out of it. And if I couldn't talk my way out of it... my attorney could argue my way out of it. And there was always the final solution: BUY MY WAY OUT OF IT!
So, the lesson that was taught to me was: there aren't ANY consequences. None! I could do whatever I wanted... and get away with it. Any time. Any place. Any where. And I was getting away with A LOT...
But. God has a marvelous sense of humor... He really does. I can't help but chuckle and laugh at all. I really can't. It tickles me. Not what I was doing. That doesn't tickle me at all! It disgusts me. But. How God dealt with me... that's funny! Really funny! He has a marvelous sense of humor. The best! The irony.... it's just too funny! Only He could pull it off...
Anyway... I met this girl. No, not my wife. Another girl. And she was beautiful. I had dated—and gone out—with a lot of gorgeous girls, but this girl? She was exceptional. Her family was exceptional. The best people. The nicest people. So, our relationship was a a typical “Lady and Tramp” story... she made me want to be a better person. To stop doing all the things that I had been doing... To quit running with the wrong crowd... To quit doing the wrong things... to give up my criminal enterprising...
She made me want to go straight...
And that's what I did. I got a job in Atlanta. I was working in the Fannie Mae building for a law group that subcontracted certain services. I reported—directly--to the Vice President of that branch. I was the only one on the payroll that knew how to do certain things... to operate certain equipment... I could always figure out how to make something work... And not just work, but work better... quicker... faster! I could see a problem—from all sides and angles—and figure out a solution...
I was also good at figuring out how to get around things... to make things happen. To get things done that other people couldn't—or wouldn't—do. And I could smooth things over... I could get people on the phone that the normal secretaries and paralegals couldn't...
It was a good job.
I had a great gal...
And I moved into my own place.
But. Like a dog returning to his vomit... there was still part of me who liked to live on the edge... To push the limits... to test the boundaries... to see if I could get away with certain things... I was a bit of an adrenaline junkie... and The Georgia State Patrol popped me for speeding really, really, really fast. I mean REALLY fast. 'Too Fast For Conditions' is an understatement....
Anyway, they took my drivers license. And I had to go get it.
Like I said: I had quit doing all the old things. For the most part. I was too busy with work. Too busy with the girl that I was seeing. But. I had old 'friends' who were still in the game... still doing their hustles... still engaging in all sorts of nefarious acts...
And although I had put some distance—a lot distance—with them... we all still talked—on occasion. Well, they happen to call me up and wanted to run some 'ideas' by me. Get my 'expert' opinion on a few plans they had. Critique them. Improve them. Offer different scenarios and contingencies... After all: I was the “diabolical mastermind” of the group... and I had this 'gift' of being able to find the weaknesses in a plan... in an operation... to spot the problems—and potential problems—before they happened. Fix them. Or, be ready to handle them...
It's what I did. Or, it was what I had done...
They needed my 'help'. I needed a ride to get my license....
They needed me. I needed them...
I knew better. A voice inside my head screamed out: “Don't do it! Don't do it, Jason! Do not agree to do it! DANGER! DANGER! Stay away... Say, 'no' and hang up. Stall them... postpone... do whatever you have to do, but don't agree...”
Well, I didn't listen to that voice. I agreed to meet with them. And, I didn't listen to the voice—that was screaming at me again!--when they pulled up in their car. Everything inside me told me, “No! Don't get in that car. Don't do it! If you get in that car you're as good as dead...”
But. I did anyway...
I didn't listen.
That's what arrogance does: it doesn't listen.
That's what cowardice does: it doesn't act.
And I was arrogant.
And I was a coward.
I got into the car...
And on the way to Union City (where the State Patrol office was that I had to go to)--as they talked to me about some of their plans—they let me know that they were going to 'hit' a couple houses on the way. When I say 'hit', I don't mean punch... slap... touch... I mean: break in and steal stuff. That's what 'hit' means...
See: We were going to pass right through Fayette County... and that's where all the rich people lived! So, they felt it was their 'duty' to deprive them of a little of their wealth... they had plenty to spare. Lots to take. They—the rich people—didn't need all that wealth... all their stuff... they needed to spread it around some...
And that's exactly what socialism is: theft! Thuggery! Take from the rich and give to the poor. We were going to take by force, but governments do it by fiat!
Now, I've been a lot of things in my life. And I've done a lot of things, but I was never really what you would call a B & E type person. Not my thing... Too much risk... Too much exposure... Too much could go wrong... Too many unknowns... Too much could happen...
See: when you break into a house... you never know what's going to happen. You never know who is there. You never who will see you... You just never know.... And that didn't sit well with me. I did things, but I didn't like unnecessary exposure... unnecessary risk...
AND trying to break into a home—in Fayette County especially!--was just way too much of a risk. They had money. They had neighbors. They had alarms. They had dogs. They had Housekeepers working...
I could think of a 100 reasons why it wasn't a good idea. Why it wasn't a smart idea. Why it was a terrible. Idea. Why it was a STUPID idea... Idiotic! And I tried to talk them out of it. I did. I even tried to barter with them. To get them to go some place remote... some place like out in the middle of Lamar County... Upson County... Monroe County...
But they weren't having any of that. None. They thought it was a grand idea. And they assured me that they would hit a home that wasn't so open—and exposed. They would find the 'right' home to hit...
Yeah right... we found the right home alright... sure did!
We pull up in a driveway... the house is somewhat secluded—somewhat. No cars appear to be present. No signs of life...
Again, I implore them to 'hit' another area. Another county... another place... not Fayette County. Not A place where they have so much money... so much law enforcement... so many resources at their disposal...
They let me know that domestic life has really shrank my testicles.
“Where is the Jason Horton that we know? The wild and crazy, Jason? The one who doesn't give a damn! The one who is cocky! Who has all the swagger? Who knows he can get away with anything? Some of the things you've pulled off? Some of the things you've done? We've seen you walk right into a place and pull off some crazy stuff! Insane stuff. People just hand it right to you... And you're worried about a little B & E in Fayette County? You've got to be kidding me! You need to man up!”
I sure did... 'manning up' would have been jumping out of the car...
But. I didn't.
I kept trying to reason with them. To get them to see that this was a REALLY bad idea. It wasn't the right place. It wasn't the right time. BAD IDEA! Kids could be home... A housekeeper could be home... A nosy neighbor could see us...
And that's when they pulled out the guns. That's when they told me if there were any 'problems' they would handle them....
That's when I knew that I was going to die. Die. That day. That very day. Some how... some way... I was going to die.
Well, at this point... I realize there wasn't any changing their minds. It was going to happen. There wasn't anything that I could do to stop it. The dice had been rolled...
So, the only thing that I could do was: try and reduce risk. Try and minimize exposure. To make this as quick and painless as possible...
So, I told them, “Okay. Fine. But we're going to do this my way. And I will be lookout. I will stand guard. And if I see anything—ANYTHING--that doesn't look right... If I hear anything—ANYTHING--that doesn't sound right... If the wind blows the wrong way and I don't like it... .we will abort! Immediately. Do you understand? This is a bad idea, but if we're going to do it... we have to be smart about how we do it. And if my spider senses tingle—even slightly—we are gone! Gone!”
They agreed.
My spider senses were tingling the second we got out of the car...
We weren't there 30 seconds... and the voice inside my head was screaming: “GET OUT OF THERE! RUN! Take off! Leave them! GO!” But. I didn't...
I stayed.
And I heard one of them making an awful racket... I mean the noise that he was making was incredible! It was like he had an amplifier hooked to his wedging device...
He was SO LOUD!
I was thinking to myself: “Does this idiot want to get caught?”
So, I lied to them. I lied to them both. I told them that someone was in the house and we had to go... Right then! Go!
At least I thought that I was lying...
We left... we weren't even there 3 minutes and we had left... I'm sure there were only a few scratch marks on the door... nothing serious. Nothing too bad. I was going to live! I was going to make it! I was going to get out of there! I was going to get to Union City and get my drivers license back—and I would never have to see them again. I would get home—see the girl I was dating—and never look back!
Well, we got about half a mile down the road and here comes a Sheriffs Car...
Followed by another...
Then another...
The passenger screams at the driver to floor it. To get the heck out of there...
So, we take off like a bat out of hell...
And one deputy's car is turning around now... blue lights are going....
The Driver to the passenger (I'm in the back seat) “The Guns! Throw out the guns! I'm a convicted felon! I can't have a firearm on me. Throw out the guns.”
So, the passenger throws them out... chunks them out the window into someone's yard...
I see them go out the window...
And I also see the bicycles in the yard... the toys... the play things...
I see a lot of toys and play things in the yards...
The guns have been thrown out in a residential neighborhood...
The guns have been thrown out in a place where some kid might find them...
Some kid might shoot themselves with it...
Some kid might shoot his little brother or sister or the neighbor next door with it...
And that's all I'm thinking about when the road is blocked off ahead of us...
More deputy’s are behind us...
And we pull over...
And one of the deputy sheriffs snatches me out of the car... throws me to the ground... and pumps his shotgun right in my face... “Don't move a muscle!”
Long story short: I broke the one rule that you never break... the one thing that you never do... I ratted. I told the truth. I told them EVERYTHING that has transpired. However, I didn't tell them everything until I made them load me up in a patrol car and go find those guns... to recover them.
Now, when I say that “I made them”... obviously I didn't make them do anything. I couldn't make them do anything. I was powerless. I was without control. But I got them to agree to it. I told them: “I will tell you EVERYTHING, but we have to go get those guns. Right now. We can't wait!”
And when they heard the word “Guns” come out of my mouth... they were all ears. And within a few seconds... we were out the door. And it took awhile... it took some time... But. They found them. They were recovered. And I was able to breathe a sigh of relief... that no mater what happened... some kid wasn't going to shoot themselves or someone else...
And the worst that I was looking at was: Attempted Burglary. Not: murder of some homeowner (who by the way: had been home! Saw it all! Heard it all! And called the police!)! Not a police officer being shot. Not some child getting hurt or killed...
Just attempted burglary.
No problem. I could 'beat' this...
I mean after all... I had done the right thing, right? I had told the truth! I had helped the police officers with their investigation. I had helped them recover the guns... maybe saved lives by getting us to leave the house... by helping them recover the guns. I had provided them with additional evidence... I had told them everything.
I had told the truth.
I had done the right thing.
Surely that would count for something, right? I mean: there were so many things that I had done in the past... so many things!... So many things that were way worse than this! So many things that were way more severe...
So many things that I had gotten away with—completely. Barely even a slap on my wrist. Surely, I wouldn't get in trouble for this, right? I had done the RIGHT thing...
My parents wouldn't bond me out. They were tired of hearing it. They had given up. And rightfully so. My grandmother wouldn't do it either. She was tired of my crap too. It was time for me to learn a lesson...
And like the little boy who cried wolf, “But I didn't do anything wrong [this time!!!!!” My family was going to leave me in there. And please understand: I'm not blaming them—at all. None. They were absolutely right to have this attitude.
But. I didn't have any plans on staying in there. I had a girl friend and a life to get back to...
So, I called up the bail bondsman and I told my story. I told what happened. I ask them to verify it with investigator. That I was telling the truth. It took a couple phone calls, but I finally found one who would work with me. They signed for my bond—which was huge!--and got me out of there. Without me paying a single penny down...
For those of you who don't know... that's not a very common occurrence. Bondsman put up large amounts of property to ensure that a suspect will appear before court. If the accused doesn't come forward... that could cause huge problems for the bondsman—and their collateral.
But I wasn't a flight risk—at least not for them. I was going to come forward to court. I wasn't scared. I had done the right thing... the truth was on my side...
Truth was on my side... God was on my side!
And you know what? God was on my side. But. Just not the way that I thought He would be...
He didn't 'speak' to me the way that I wanted to be spoken to...
He didn't 'treat' me the way that I thought that I should be treated.
He didn't 'do' what I thought should be done...
God didn't 'behave' in the manner in which I expected Him to...
Actually, I thought it was pretty ugly...
Pretty mean...
Not nice!
Not sweet!
Not caring!
Not compassionate!
Not loving!
In fact: I thought it was down right hateful!
He started making His thoughts...
His intentions...
His plans WELL KNOWN to me!
He made them perfectly clear!
PERFECTLY CLEAR!
And you know what? I didn't like them! Not one single bit.
None!
I didn't want to hear it!
None!
Not any!
See: I wasn't ANYTHING like this Gentile woman... Nothing like her! She had humility! I had nothing but arrogance! She was motivated by love—love for something outside of herself! I was motivated by: love of self. Saving my own neck. Doing what I wanted. Getting what I wanted...
She was patient.
I was impulsive.
She was trusting.
I was not.
She had her eyes on the Lord.
I had my eyes on myself. My circumstances.
She was teachable.
I was not.
She stood there helpless and hopeless and broken...
I stood there haughty, hoping in my self, and completely self-absorbed.
So, Just like the Gentile Woman... The Lord Spoke to me.... Not with an actual voice. Not literally... There was no actual voice...
But. The Lord Spoke to me Just the same... and what He has to say... it wasn't nice. Not to me.
And I didn't want to hear it. Not in the least.
But the Lord said it anyway...
Jesus Christ controls history and He was about to make that fact known to me: perfectly!
26 And He answered and said,“It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.”
So often we ask ourselves... Why would the Lord do this? Why would the Lord allow this? Why is the Lord keep letting this happen? Why does He Keep letting this happen? How can He permit such things to take place...
Awful things...
Terrible things..
Parents are our FIRST LINE of defense in society.
But. Bible Doctrine... The Mind of Christ is our first line of defense in satan's cosmic system... the world that we live in...
And the Lord often speaks to us through circumstances to: teach us. To: train us. To: test us. To: transform us.
And you know what? There was something that He wanted to teach me... there was something that He wanted me to learn... there was something that He had to remind me of: what I was meant to do. What I had turned my back on...
I had turned my back on Him.
I had turned my back on Bible Doctrine.
I had turned my back on what I was meant to do.
But. He loves me too much to let me forget...
He was about to teach me...
Train me...
Test me...
Transform me...
And I was going to kick and scream and pitch a fit the entire way...
We'll continue this later. A lot more to say about why God 'speaks' to us in certain ways...
A lot more to say.
There just aren't enough words in the human language to properly convey His grace.
It's my prayer that you come to know it. You come to know Him.
His Words.
His Doctrines.
